Even with the highest intentions, we still raise our young ones from old paradigms that do not work for children’s development. The fact that depressed teens and suicide It tells us that something is very wrong.
It is easy to say that children with depression lack it Respect my self – Of course this is true – but we have to ask why? There is a stark and obvious reason that an epidemic of depression is pervasive in our youth. If you are a parent, this can be a difficult topic to accept as it often makes us feel helpless, but when you understand the real reasons why children suffer from chronic depression, you have the power to help your child turn it around.
I was a suicide counselor in New York for seven years. During this time, I counseled depressed and suicidal teens ages 11-19. They told me things they never dared tell anyone else. Every one of these kids was nervous about school, whether they were doing well or not. These children themselves felt as if they had parents to judge them and they could not trust. These children felt exhausted and lonely – each of them was sure that he would fail in life.
It’s not teen heartbreak that makes kids commit suicide. It is the constant pressure and pressure on the school and the parents.
Yes, as parents, we want what’s best for our children and we want them to grow up to be successful, but maybe our ideas of success are actually killing them. We come from an old paradigm that says, “Do well in school, get into a good college, make a good income by doing whatever you need to do to survive, and hopefully after retirement, you’ll have a few good years to enjoy the rest of your life.”
We instill fear in our children by telling them that if they don’t get proper grades, their lives are doomed to failure, but failure at anything? Failing to live an unpleasant life. Then I say, go ahead andfail!!!
Out of our fear, we make the idea of success more important than the lives of our dear children. But, are grades really more important than your child’s emotional well-being? Do you want an average half-dead child, or a cheerful, awake child with deep knowledge that goes beyond conventional education?
I’d rather have a child who knows his worth and knows he can go out into the world and create anything, rather than a child who blindly follows him only to experience a lifelong midlife crisis. Let’s wake up!
We have sinned and our parents have sinned. Let’s stop it now, and stop doing what isn’t working.
I share this, not to blame anyone, but instead to inspire parents and caregivers to embrace a new paradigm that enables our young people to wake up, step into their power, and ultimately live happy, fulfilling lives.
if we understand Why Our children are depressed, and we have the power to help them wake up from depression, and be who they are here to be.
Read 4 common symptoms of depression in children
Although the dynamics can be complex, there are three components that lead to adolescent depression:
- feelings of unworthiness
- feelings of helplessness
- Not getting unconditional support from an adult
Feelings of unworthiness, vulnerability, and loneliness is a breeding ground for teen depression.
Wherever you look, children are judged relentlessly. Schools, religions, cultures, and parents judge children and tell them who they should be and how they should behave, and if they fail to meet these expectations or requirements, they are punished, not only by losing privileges or failing in some way, but especially in locking up love, approval, and acceptance.
We don’t usually think of it that way, but The byproduct of judgment is actually the withholding of love, acceptance, and acceptance. When these emotional needs are obscured by parents and their caregivers, children often think they are not worthy. To make matters worse, the human psyche interprets the judgment as a refusal, and further evidence that the person being judged is unworthy – severing the soul of the young man who is naturally trying to find himself.
When kids don’t feel entitled, they withdraw and go in – we call that depression but it’s actually a survival mechanism where they protect themselves from further rejection that comes in the form of judgment.
In fact, every emotional wound can be traced back to a feeling of unworthiness. Feeling of worthlessness is the primary wound of all wounds. The constant judgment that children go through on a daily basis often results in deep emotional wounds that affect the child into adulthood and throughout his/her life.
You may not have much control over what goes on at school, but how your parenting at home can make a huge difference to your children’s emotional well-being and development.
Read When Things Get Tough: How You Can Help Kids Build Resilience