Psychological health

The 6 Commandments Of Vulnerable Communication

Allowing yourself to be poor at communication can only increase misunderstanding.

Our fears can take over our brains emotionally. They can completely consume our thoughts in an endless void of fear.

Opening up about yourself, exposing who you are and what you need can be intimidating in our society. We were brought up to be calm. Not to be too noisy or crazy. We are expected to not draw attention to ourselves, and to act like everyone else.

For me, that required stuffing our feelings deep inside and putting a mask on our face that said to the world, “I’m really happy.” Under that filling, plaster is hardened to protect the world from frustration, confusion, and feelings of neglect.

The other day I was asked, “Should I address every issue of my past relationships right away?” For some of us, this is just a trash can full of baggage. For others, it’s a Texas-sized worry dump.

If you are like the latter, it means expressing every worry and doubt that comes to your mind. I just laughed at that guy’s joke. Is he funnier than me? In your mind, this forms her day hips as she enters this Joster’s arms and falls in love with him. I left you behind.

Realistically, this is very unlikely. Your fear is the result of a distorted perception of your worth and self-esteem. If your self-esteem is low, you may see the relationship as something fragile – like a vase swinging over the edge of a table.

The more you suppress your fears, and the more you allow your theories to capture your thoughts, the more your fears and fears will increase. One day, one of these fears will become unmanageable — like a mint falling into your Coke bottle from fizzy feelings.

In the end, all of this suppression would explode so fiercely that they wouldn’t even be able to see where this one came from. Your emotional outburst does not match the normal emotional response to such a problem.

This ridiculous reaction makes your partner think you’re crazy. It’s impossible for them to know about all your bottled-up frustrations that led up to this point.

Related: 12 life hacks to improve communication in your relationships

The solution to throwing a liter of feelings into your partner about a can-size problem is to express your feelings the moment they happen. Normally, if you reveal things that bother you the moment they start and receive a positive response, your fears won’t get any worse.

When problems arise in any type of relationship, it is the result of conflicting emotional schemas of expectations within the relationship. No one person sees the world the same way you do.

The secret to understanding each other better seems to come not from being more able to read body language or adopting an improved perspective, but rather through the hard relational work of putting people in a position where they can tell you their thoughts openly and honestly.

The way your needs are met and your understanding and the quality of your relationships are deepened is through this very scary thing called vulnerability. It is the desire to open up and expose your true intentions, fears, and desires.

“Owning our own story can be difficult but not as difficult as spending our lives escaping from them. Embracing our weaknesses is risky but not as dangerous as giving up love, belonging, and joy – experiences that make us more vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover strength The infinity of our light. – Brian Brown

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