Psychological health

How Do You Know If You Are Dating A Predator?

These emotional predators use many tactics to nurture their need for power and control, but they can be quite deceitful and expert at concealing their true intentions. Recognizing the signs of an emotional predator will help you protect yourself, especially if you are dating one of these predators.

Dating an emotional predator like a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath is an emotionally destructive game of highs and lows.

Although many abusers tend to reveal and reveal their true selves long after they have already cornered their victims, there are some key signs to look for when dating someone that can foreshadow their future behavior.

It is important to note that emotional predators are not those who act out of their pain once in a while; These are toxic people who go after victims and targets on purpose and consciously to achieve their agenda. They have a chronic pattern of manipulation and deception that is accompanied by a lack of empathy and remorse for their actions.

What many people fail to understand is that this type of behavior is intentional, sadistic, and often premeditated.

If these predators suffer from narcissistic personality disorder or antisocial personality disorder, their lack of empathy is intrinsic to their disorder. The National Domestic Violence Hotline dispels the myth that abuser mental illness causes abuse — because abusers don’t abuse everyone — and they usually choose to abuse their closest and dearest.

Read: Narcissists, NPD and Their Partners

Choice by the aggressor

In these cases, the cause of the abuse is more from the choice of the abuser rather than his mental illness. These individuals can quickly “switch” their masks when in the public eye. This means that their abuse is under their conscious control and that the abuser is still responsible for continuing to abuse others and not seeking treatment.

The predatory nature of these types of individuals has already been well documented and researched by experts such as Dr. Robert Hare, Andy Bancroft, Dr. Martha Stout, Therapist Christine Cannon of Louisville and Dr. George Simon.

Many of them worked with these abusers and their victims as agents. Everyone found that the abuse was intentional and so was manipulation. In fact, these researchers and advocates discovered that many abusers enjoyed and gained a sense of satisfaction from manipulating others for their own gain.

The great thing about dating is that you don’t commit to a relationship, so you can use this process as a way to learn more about a potential partner and, if necessary, cut ties if he turns out to have abusive traits without further investing in the relationship.

Read – How the narcissist plays you and how the cycle of abuse works

Signs of an emotional predator such as narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths

Are you dating an emotional predator? Here are the signs to look for.

1. A need to control.

Abusers want to control and manipulate their victims, so they will find secret ways to maintain control over them psychologically. They can maintain this control in several ways:

Excessive contact.

Although many people don’t realize it, excessive flattery and attention from a charming manipulator is actually a form of control because it makes you rely on their praise. If you find yourself being bombarded with texts, voicemails, calls, and emails every hour in the early stages of dating, be sure to look out for other signs.

It may seem unbelievable for someone to be surrounded by you after just one date, but it’s actually a red flag for questionable behavior and unwarranted attachment. It’s not normal to be in touch with someone 24/7 especially if you’ve only been with them on a few dates. No one has time to constantly “check in” with someone they’re “just” dating.

This type of contact is ideal for abusers to “check in” with you to see what you intend to do, and to ensure that you are appropriately “connected” to their interest, a form of “idealization” that will put you on a base that initially seems irresistible. Of course, if you’re familiar with the narcissist’s vicious cycle of abuse that includes idealization, devaluation, and disposal, you’ll know you’ll be paying close to the norm.

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