Worried about encounters with your toxic family during the holidays? Are you afraid to see them at the most beautiful time of the year, because the only thing you feel when you are with them is unhappiness and annoyance?
It’s the most beautiful time of the year.
It’s time to go home for the holidays with your family. She listens to Christmas carols playing all over the place while drinking eggnog. Smell the chestnuts roasting on an open fire while you relax with your family in front of the gorgeous Christmas tree.
You laugh hysterically while your drunken Uncle John, dressed as a father, handed out gifts to everyone. And on top of that, you see the snow falling outside paving the way for the perfect white Christmas.
“Christmas is a dear family time. Family time is a sacred time.”– Unknown
Despite the harsh weather outside, Christmas is a wonderful time full of warmth, joy and happiness to share with your family and create new memories together. It is a time when you forget all your problems and fears and you just relax and have fun.
But not for everyone!
“At Christmas, all roads lead home.” – Marjorie Holmes
For many people out there, the holidays can be a nightmare to dread. The main reason for this is toxic family members, and dealing with a toxic family during the holidays.
The moment you come home at Christmas, you feel drained of all your energy. You hear your brothers screaming everywhere as you try to dodge their abusive verbal bullets at you. When you choke on tasteless eggnog, you smell dinner burning in the oven.
When you sit down for a moment of peace in front of a shabby decorated Christmas tree, you realize it has the exact same decorations from last year. You laugh hysterically at your plight because your drunken Uncle John dressed up as Homeless Father Christmas is offending and cursing everyone. And on top of that, you see the snow falling outside to make sure you can’t escape this white, red and green nightmare.
If this is what Christmas looks like to you, you need to know that you are not alone. According to a Healthline study, about 62 percent of people experience increased levels of stress during the holidays. This is mostly due to their toxic family dealings during the holidays.
Dealing with your toxic family over the holidays can seriously affect your self-esteem and cause you to return to therapy even though you worked all year to rebuild yourself and your self-esteem. Crazy family dynamics can not only ruin the holiday season but also ruin your mental and emotional health.
RELATED: Why Narcissists Love to Ruin Birthdays and Holidays
When the Christmas tree falls
“The best gifts on any Christmas tree: having a happy family wrapped together.” – Burton Hillis
Christmas for You doesn’t look like the perfect Hallmark holiday by a long shot. Instead of loving siblings, cousins, and relatives, you have to deal with abuse, alienation, addiction, and negativity. The more you try to tell yourself that you can get through this, the more nervous you will feel because you can’t see how you can do it.
Meetings with your toxic family during the holidays can put you in difficult situations and leave you feeling suffocated.
As criticism and insults flow freely through the house and make you feel like a worthless loser, you start to lose your temper and your old emotional wounds start to resurface.
With your older brother showing you how much better you are, your mother-in-law telling your wife how she could have done so much better, and your new cousin’s boyfriend cracking the meanest and most idiotic jokes, you become a semi-killer and wonder if a Christmas bonfire was a bad idea. You feel inclined to call Krampus instead of Santa Claus this Christmas.
But you don’t have to.
You don’t need to lose your mind. Spending time with your toxic family during the holidays doesn’t have to ruin the rest of your life. You just need the right strategy to survive the holidays with your sanity.
Related Topics: How Toxic Family Dynamics May Cause C-PTSD In Children With Emotional Stress